1. Have you thought about what it is that makes you an excellent communicator? Whatever your answer is, that is your core strength. Let's say that you are known for giving clear messages. When you talk to your team, they know without a doubt what you mean and seldom ask for clarification. Embrace that knowledge and start building around it.
2. Add the input you get from the questions that are being asked as much as the questions you never get. What isn't said is just as important as what is, something one of my Political Science teachers at Stockholm University once told me. Going back to our example, the clear messages. You might come off as someone who doesn't want feedback. Of course you do. Try asking for that from time to time and see where that leads you. If nobody speaks up, ask for diverging points of view, using first names and showing your appreciation, no matter what.
3. Mirror the people you talk to. I don't mean "do what they do and talk as they talk", but adapt your body language, your tone of voice and your way of speaking. What you are after is identification and relatability. Adapting to others is seldom a bad move. Don't go over board, just tweak your style a bit . You'll be surprised at the results.
4. Always think about the context. How are the people you're talking to feeling? Are they sharing particular concerns? If so, don't ignore that. Bring it into your message and share your own concerns. It's human to have feelings and understanding, if only in words, goes a long way. We don't always share the same emotions, but we all have emotions. Again, mirroring but a bit more action oriented. And yes, words are actions as well.
5. Finally, take a look at people who you admire for their communication skills. What is it that makes you admire them? Pick three words. Then, use one of these as an inspiration for your own interactions.
We all communicate, constantly. Verbally and non-verbally. In one language or many. What we say and how we say it is who we come across as. Be yourself, and keep evolving into the next you. We are in constant change. Let's make sure it's in the right direction. What is "right", as always, depends on a lot of different factors, both internal and external. Enjoy your challenges!
Maria Kristina Tellsten is a Leadership Communication Consultant, English for a Latin American context.
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